I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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