So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
