Yo dont text me then not text me
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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