if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
