used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
