Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just want nice things and good sex
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
