if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
