Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
