Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
