Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
