Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
