It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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