it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
