Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
