I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
