I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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