He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize