Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
