Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
