Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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