I'm really into asian looking animals
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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