About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I need moral support for this bender
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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