i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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