She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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