I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize