When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize