it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
