A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
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