This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Someone came in the potted fern
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
