k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
