Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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