The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
ok first of all what the fuck
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
