My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
