I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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