idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize