my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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