I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize
