I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Randomize