im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize