I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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