But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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