just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
