is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize