apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Randomize
