I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Do vagina's smell?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
