i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize