I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
