bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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