You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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