OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
