We need to start having sex underwater more often.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize